Enslaved by Ducks by Bob Tarte

308 pages

"When Bob Tarte bought a house in rural Michigan, he was counting on a tranquil haven. Then Bob married Linda. She wanted a rabbit, which seemed, at the time, innocuous enough. But that was just the beginning. Wouldn't a parrot be cute?  Linda said. Bob suddenly found himself constructing pens, buying feed, clearing duck waste, spoon-feeding at mealtime. One day he realized he'd become a servant to a relentlessly demanding family, and a motley crew it was.

Writing as someone who's been ambushed by the way in which animals, even cranky ones, can wend their way into the heart, Bob Tarte reveals the truth of animal ownership - and who really owns whom."
-Back Cover

This book is a great way to figure out if you are an animal lover or not. I am not. I sort of already knew that. I feel compassionate towards animals; I'll pet my sisters' dogs. I'll make sure my chickens have food and water every day and occasionally, on a really cold day, even make them some oatmeal, but I would absolutely draw a line if one of them starting ringing a bell to have their every demand catered to. I would never let my pets destroy my house by chewing up furniture and power cords. I would not let my pets eat at the dinner table with me, especially if they throw their food all around the room. Therein lies my annoyance with the book: I don't believe in letting animals control your life. My other problem with this book was that the author spends so much time trying to make you believe that he really doesn't want all these animals or care about them, yet that's totally bogus. He loves them just as much, if not more, than his wife, and is the most heartbroken - even needing Zoloft to handle his depression - when they die. Just admit that you're totally smitten by your pets and then  write about the funny things they do and their quirky personalities. I think I would have enjoyed that more. Frankly, I almost stopped reading this book because he didn't.

I get that animals have personalities. I see that in my chickens. I know that pets can be very loving. I just don't think they should be treated as equals, particularly when they have a brain the size of a pea. I don't think they should get full run of the house and make you change the way you live to accommodate their every whim. They're birds and bunnies people!

If you are an animal lover, especially of birds, you will really enjoy this book. The author does have a great sense of humor and some of his analogies were laugh-out loud funny, I just didn't connect.